New Mormon Themed Restaurant Chain
This is a sparkling new idea for a chain of non-pretentious Utah restaurants. The name of these restaurants: "The Steak Center" Each Steak Center will have one enormous dining area with basketball hoops at either end and folding metal chairs and long tables covered in plastic tablecloths. The Steak Centers will not have hostesses, but greeters, (men in their 70's who will meet you at the door and talk like they have known you all your life).
The main menu items will be: Porterhouse Rockwell Steak, Primary Rib, and the Poor Wayfaring Pan of Beef, garnished with Parsley P. Pratt Funeral Potatoes. We will also have, when it's in season, Eliza R. Snow crab. Let's not forget a whole line of "And It Came to Pasta",including Kraft Moroni and Cheese.
Additionally, we'll have breakfast items, including Pearls of Great Rice and Frosted Minivans, as well as Adam-ondi-Omelettes. The house drink is "Apple Juice."
Also available, "In Our Lovely Desserts", including Fast Sundaes, Gadianton Cobbler and the sinful Laman Meringue Pie and Lemuel ice cream.
The waiters will be 12 and 13 year-old boys wearing white shirts and their fathers' ties. At the end of the night the customers will be asked to help fold up the chairs and tables and vacuum the floor.
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